A Rant To My Abuser

Today I’m doing a bit of a rant post regarding one of my abusers. I made a completely fresh ANONYMOUS twitter and blog in order to speak freely. Something I’ve not been able to do since 2014. I didn’t name and shame anybody and my posts have never had the purpose of shaming anybody, I just wanted to be to able to show people that they’re not alone and that it’s possible to bounce back from childhood abuse. Since I posted the original 3 posts about my childhood I’ve not used this blog OR my twitter as a platform to publicly bash my abusers, most of it has just been about me, and being able to be myself without their judgement. With that said, I’ll move on to my rant.

As I’ve said I made a completely anonymous Twitter and blog and I’ll add I wasn’t so stupid as to follow my abusers. I managed a mere 3/4 weeks before X (Dad’s girlfriend) had found my anonymous accounts. How she’s found them I don’t know. So I had 3/4 weeks of privacy in the past 3 1/2 years. Pitiful right? She not only found them but then publicly bashed me YET AGAIN. Telling her friends that I’m a stalker, and a troll, and I bully her. Saying I’ve disallowed her to speak about anything and that I’ve backed her into a corner. Portraying me as a horrible person saying I’ve made a career out of taking people to court. Yes that’s right, the evil narcissist who was the sole reason my relationship with my Dad went wrong has the audacity to say these things about me. I’m here to set the record straight, knowing she will be reading this unfortunately.

Firstly, I’m not a stalker. I’ll be the first to admit I watch your twitter and I’ve never denied it, but when you feel paranoia about the things someone is saying about you, sometimes you do things you’re not proud of. The fact of the matter is I have become obsessive about it and it’s something we’re addressing in my therapy, I’ll admit that. But it started because for over a year I forgot you even existed and yet you constantly posted juvenile bully posts about me. We’d had no contact for 13 months? So that’s why this begun. And ever since whilst the bashing has calmed, the indirect posts have continued on a day to day basis. The fact of the matter is I’m unable to post a tweet saying:

Roll on 2018 🎉

It was at 2am, I was tired and I used the incorrect roll/role. You posted a photo of a dictionary. And it’s the same over everything I post. And I’ll admit it makes my blood boil (although that’s probably your intention anyways) because of the absolute injustice! You ruined an innocent child’s life all on account of the fact your a spoilt little girl who didn’t like having no control over me. I’ll admit I did wrong, but at the very start I was still just an innocent child. And yet you get to go around lying to your friends telling them I emotionally abused you. I cannot stress enough that when you CHOSE to never speak to me I had no choice but to put your laundry in the dryer, or have a bath, because I’m not a fucking psychic and I don’t understand why that’s so hard to comprehend. You weren’t the only person in that house and you behaved like you were and cried abuse when I went about essential chores like washing my clothes. That’s not abuse. Abuse is sitting downstairs all day, whilst I’m upstairs, hearing my music for the 2 minutes it took you to use the bathroom, and still making my Dad come and tell me off despite it not effecting you. That’s emotional abuse. The hypocrisy is actually laughable. That’s why I watch your Twitter…

So when you’re telling your little friends your bagful of lies I’d like you to remember why this all started because unfortunately mud sticks, and when you treat a person like shit, when you absolutely destroy their life, you have absolutely NO right to complain if they display paranoid traits. And the fact you can’t recognise your mistakes or show remorse whilst I can says everything that I can’t.

Finally, I’d like to make it clear that even though you might have destroyed my childhood I am so unbelievable happy now. I never needed you, and I’ve managed just fine without my Dad. Don’t think you even effected my adult life because you haven’t. I’ve got a great family outside of you pair, and I’ve got a great quality of life. I never want for nothing, and I don’t rely on anybody to support me. I got everything I could ever want from life because of the rubbish you caused so for that, thank you.

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